...And That's Why I Carried the Ax to Work

I did my friend a favor.  He needed to get rid of some fluorescent bulbs and he asked me to throw them in my trash. I said I would (and no, I don't care if I just released fifteen pounds of carcinogens into the atmosphere) and he gave me an ax to use the handle so that I could break them up.  Not a problem, he's a good friend, I know that he would do the same for me.

I put the bulbs in my trash and then gently tapped them with the handle.  I was wearing safety glasses that protected my face, Momma, and I made sure to wear gloves and a long sleeve shirt.  In about five minutes, the bulbs were broken and my trashcan was set to the curb.  I thought no more about it. 

Today, I remembered to bring the ax back to friend I had done the favor for.  That may be the highlight of my week, so much so, that I start carrying an ax back and forth from work to home.

First, my annoying neighbor with the biting dog snatched that dog inside.  He only got out one half of one annoying yip, and the neighbor had the dog air born.  The last notes of the yip are still hanging in the air like one of those word bubbles in a comic book. (Graphic novel, sorry) I despise the little biting rat.  I laughed out loud.

Next, the crazy neighbor who always talks about something from 1978 suddenly remembered something inside and didn't even call out to me.  I'm thinking that the ax is the best accessory since my keys.  It's not that heavy, and people really do seem to notice it.  The folks who walk two wide on the sidewalk all made a path for me.  It was great.

Finally, at the curb, not one car seemed to have a problem with me walking across the street.  No one rushed into the intersection.  No one stopped ten inches away while I crossed.  No one made eye contact.  It was fantastic!  Kind of like walking in my own little world.  I may have to start bringing an ax back and forth more often.  If you get the chance, try it.
And before I forget, enjoy your Holiday weekend.  Every single time that I look up at the fireworks, I remember displays from times past.  It's my own little time travelling device.  From fireworks in Lake City, Florida to Chicago at Great Lakes Naval Base (where the guy stood in front of the display and took his leg off at the knee) I remember who I was with (once my best friend in the whole world where we traded burgers for beers and another time I was with the first love of my life.) Another great fireworks display was at Disney World.  That was quite possibly the best fire works I have ever seen.  They set them to the 1812 Overture.  Breathtaking.  So celbrate all that is wonderful about our Republic.  Just leave the ax out of your commute.  You'll thank me later.