Is God Using Walmart?

Don't you just love Morgan Freeman? I think he is one of the ten best actors working today. He has that wonderful voice, and his eyes always seem to be smiling, as if he knows something very, very funny and is about to share it with you. He was able to carry that wretched actor Tim Robbins in The Shawshank Redemption, making that movie my second favorite adaptation of a Stephen King novel. Normally, Mr. King's novels and the movie that comes later have only a title in common. The Shining is an excellent example of this, but Mr. Freeman made that prison movie wonderful in spite of Tim Robbins. To get back to point, in another movie of his, Mr. Freeman plays God to Steve Carrell's Evan. It's a sequel, another thing that usually makes me nervous. Nothing is worse than a group of people guilty of going to the well too often, but Evan Almighty is a cute movie with something that you don't see too often in Hollywood. It features a religious person who isn't a bigot, hypocrite, or a crazy person. Just someone with a deep and abiding faith. Cool. So anyway, to shorten this, at one point God is explaining how he works to someone. He tells them, "If you pray for strength, I don't give you strength, I give you opportunities to be strong." Or something like that. Either way, that phrase really stayed with me because I have on many many MANY occasions prayed for patience. I think now I was being given opportunities to be patient. Maybe that's what Walmart is, do you think? If you pray for patience, God certainly lets you have opportunities at the retail fun house we all know and love, doesn't he? If you are praying for hope, strength or courage, He fires a lot of those opportunities at you everyday while you are there also,doesn't he? Wouldn't it be fantastic if Walmart was in fact just a way for God to test us and give us opportunities for the things that he wants us to have? I think it would be, anyway. Some times that thought is the only one getting me through a particularly crazy patch in my life. So, if Walmart is giving you fits-and the odds of that look pretty good- don't despair, perhaps God is just giving you opportunities. I hope that that helps. If it does, you can thank me later.

Hillbilly vs Whitetrash

Have you ever seen the movie, A Christmas Story? If you have a television and TBS, there is a good chance that you have. One of the scenes in that movie stayed with me. It's when the narrator is describing the neighbors as hillbillies. I know it is played for laughs, but to some members of my family, it isn't so funny. You see, being southern, we have a different view of what a hillbilly is, and I think the confusion is when people think hillbilly means one thing, when the word you are looking for is whitetrash. I'll try to give a few examples. If on New Year's Eve, your Father goes outside at midnight and shoots his gun to usher in the New Year, you are in the Hillbilly column. If you spend part of the New Year's holiday listening to a cousin's wife laugh and brag about being so wasted the garbage was talking to her, you have crossed over to white trash. If you have to calm your Brother down who is upset because our Father has died, and he has lost his temper at everything and everyone, and shouted for them to leave, you are looking at a Hillbilly situation. If you have to call a Bail bond and set up bail because your stupid brother decided to drive thirty miles while he was drunk again, you are looking at white trash. If your Father gives you a novelty gift of a singing fish, you go in the hillbilly column. If your father makes a special trip every year so that he can give you a copy of Hustler (after reading it himself, of course) for your Birthday- march on into the white trash line. Are you irritated with a relative and say some ugly things about them in another room at the Christmas dinner? Hillbilly. Do you get into a screaming match with your daughter while everyone is trying to eat a Christmas meal? Whitetrash. Did you take your mistress to the family dinner while your wife was at home? Whitetrash. Have you taken your family to a funeral viewing and been in a hurry? May be a hillbilly, some people just hate funerals. Did you take your children and your mistress to the viewing ? Did you run into your wife's Aunt while you were there? You may be the King of White Trash. Where do you keep your crown? Do you see the differences? There are many more examples I could call on, but I am sure that you get the point. And do a lot of Hillbillies shop at Walmart? Most definitely. I can't think of anyone that doesn't like to save money. But do Whitetrash shop there? Oh boy, do they! You can't miss them, their children don't have shoes on their dirty feet, and there is a good chance that the baby is drinking coke out of a baby bottle. They may have left the mistress in the car while they take the children in, but people see, and my how they talk about it. But they still bring money, or food stamps, and that is all that Walmart is worried about. In the corporate world, you don't really worry about where the money is coming from, just that the money is brought. I don't have a problem with being a Hillbilly. My Dad was so very proud of it, he often described himself as one. But Whitetrash? That is the reason that you raise your children well, or try to, anyway. You try to teach your children the self-respect and sense of decency that they will need to be contributing members of society. You just hope that it sticks. I don't think anyone consciously means to be whitetrash. Maybe they just don't ever see another way to live. Maybe they take it to be normal because they don't know any other way. If I ever find out, there might be a Nobel Prize in it for me. I'll pass it on and you can thank me later. ps Happy Birthday, Keith!!

Why Aren't People Honest?

I started today's blog about being unfaithful, and half way through it I had to stop and delete the whole thing. I was on a rant, and while they can be cathartic, I don't think that they are very interesting to read. Unless of course you are named in it. But after hitting the backspace button for a minute, I came at the topic from another angle. It's still close, but hopefully this way I won't start sermonizing. Why aren't people honest anymore? When did it become okay to lie to someone and not expect to have any consequences for it? Was it back in the day when Slick Willie wanted to parcel out what the meaning of "is" was? Or was it before that? It must have seemed like the normal thing for him to do if he was so comfortable with it that he wanted to give perjury a shot. But I can't really put my finger on when being honest and truthful started taking a backseat to the lying, corrupt dishonesty that is so commonplace now. Any ideas? Me neither. When ever I watch a character in a movie who is obviously lying and about to be caught, I always get uncomfortable. It isn't very entertaining to me to see someone squirming around in their mess of lies. Maybe it's because I can get that any time, it doesn't make any sense to make a special effort to see that. When did honesty become such a rare thing? Why is it that there is a whole industry based on finding out if someone is being honest? It seems that if we have to pay people just to figure out the truth, we have gone badly off course, don't you think? And then there are the people who are caught lying. Have they no shame, what so ever? Have you ever heard Bill Clinton issue an apology for any of the stuff that he has done? Or do you quietly see another settlement figure on the crawl of the twenty four hour news channels? The worst part is when the dishonest person is someone that you had great feeling for, at one time. Watching the person that you cared about, as he wallows in lie after lie can be heartbreaking. Sometimes just hearing his voice as he measures out another of his carefully constructed stories is enough to make you want to put your fingers in your ears and never hear from him again. But that won't work. Your arms would get tired, wouldn't they? But anyway, I am still looking for the answer of when peole stopped being honest. If I get the answer to that, I'll let you know, and you can thank me later.

Catholicism : Or One of the Few Religions You Can Still Make Fun Of

Do you remember when the book Satanic Verses came out? The stink that was raised that sent Mr. Rushdie into hiding for his life was unbelievable. I tried to read the book. Twice. I still don't know what all the fuss was about. It took a different approach to Muhammed, but then, I thought that was what Religious Freedom was all about? Isn't it ironic that when some groups are fighting for religious freedoms, they only want freedom for what they believe, no one else? It would seem that the Muslim faith is above reproach , wouldn't it? One that isn't is Catholicism. If you are watching an action movie and a church is about to be blown to kingdom come (yes, I meant the pun) the odds are that the church in question will be some variation of a Catholic Church. Statues of saints are about to go flying, and if they can shoot a couple crucifixes-bonus!! You never see a synagogue or God forbid (another pun for those keeping score) a Mosque. Watch the movie-if you can-Hard Rain. You know that the church is going to be toast as soon as you see the statues of saints. Another good example would be the series Seinfeld. There is one episode when a confessional is visited. At least three pathetic sight gags are attempted, all of them poking fun at one religion. Which one? Guess. The only one it seems to still be Politically Correct to make fun of. And don't get me started on jokes about Priests. I know, there have been some horrible things done by Priest in the past. I am not condoning or defending that. I will personally flip the switch on those abominations that hurt defenseless children. But look up the statistics on sexual misconduct and you will quickly discover that Protestant Ministers are much more often arrested for some sort of inappropriate conduct. Do you hear about them on the news? Riiiiight. About as often as you see the censored twenty seconds of the Rodney King fiasco. The point I am trying to make is that it seems like Christianity is under attack, and no one seems to care at all. I hate to think that some persecution is allowed. That would be the very thing that the ACLU and those other hypocritical organizations are against, right? Pick any movie with a conflict and a church in it. Let's say Footloose. What do you have, besides the cool dance moves and a strange town that seems to have mountains from the west in some shots, and Spanish Moss from the south in others? Well, the other thing you have is the natural connection between religious zealots and censorship. In movies and media they goose step hand in hand don't they? Why is it necessary to make fun of a religion in the first place? I hope that they can find a new punch line soon, making fun of people for their beliefs is getting a little tedious. Another example would be Sarah Palin. Never mind that BO attended the same church of a hate spewing minister for over twenty years and never noticed anything amiss. Why in the world did so many media types hoof it all the way to Alaska, just to "report" on the church that Mrs. Palin attends. How disappointed they must have been when they couldn't buy a copy of a hate filled sermon from her Minister. I hope for religious tolerance. I really do, I know we have the freedom thing guaranteed, but it sure would be cool if they could add a few cups of tolerance. If I find it, I'll let you know and you can thank me later.

A Couple More Ideas for the Late Sam Walton's Company

My memory is terrible. I am not exaggerating, ask anyone that loves me and they will tell you that I cannot remember squat. Normally, at least one of my palms is covered in messages and things that I don't want to forget. Sadly, that doesn't always help. But one thing I do remember is when Walmart used to be a great place to work. It offered many chances that other companies didn't, and it gave quite a few people the opportunity to go further with their life then they ever thought possible. If you work for the Happy Hoe Down of Retail for very long, you start to pick up their jargon. One of the big ones that the Walmart crowd likes to use is opportunities. As in they won't say, "You did a really crappy job on that zone." What they will say is, "You have a lot of opportunities with the zone that you just did. Perhaps you want to take another look at it and try again." I am not kidding, I have heard this exact wording come out of more than one manager's mouth. I guess it is nicer way of telling someone that they did a crappy job, but the problem is when euphemisms become the norm, and it covers up what is going on. An example of that would be when Walmart explains that they have " affordable comprehensive insurance coverage" for their associates. This would be a lie. What they have are some insurance choices, and those are getting worse and worse. One of the plans that they have offered has a three thousand dollar deductible! Granted, the premiums are very low, but so what? Who has three thousand dollars that they can just liquidate in case they are in an accident? Not many of the people working for you-know-who, I can tell you that. I remember the first open enrollment when they offered this particular "plan." Even the back office associate whose job it was to explain all the choices was hesitant. She said more than once, "This is coverage in the barest minimum. Having this is insurance in name only. Think very hard before you choose something like this, okay?" So if the people who are selling it can't even endorse it, how bad must it be? Even with my bad memory, I know I have touched on the topic of Walmart doing away with the "coverage" they offer and integrating those folks into other jobs. BlueCross and BlueShield only administers the coverage, they don't actually provide the insurance in question. That would be like McDonald's only serving the hamburgers, not really cooking them for you. Then why bother? Again, I know I've said this before, but why doesn't Walmart just shop that insurance out to the local agents in the area, and let the associates vote on which company they want to award the job to. A win-win, associates get decent coverage at an affordable rate, and some lucky, hardworking insurance company gets a pool of over one hundred potential customers. No one loses in a deal like that. Another "opportunity" for Walmart would be the way they award promotions and allow associates into the management program. Instead of doing it in house, why doesn't Walmart set up a group of associates who travel from store to store and evaluate the personnel who are applying for a particular job promotion or to enter the trainee program? They could even integrate some of those insurance folks who were replaced when the insurance got outsourced? It would be a great chance (or opportunity if you will) for anyone who wanted to travel and see more of the company, wouldn't it? And, best of all, the people applying for these positions would have a more fair chance. Instead of the job going to the associate who kisses the best butt, the associates could actually have a fair and unbiased evaluation of their skills! How cool is that? But again, these are all just suggestions, aren't they? Until more managers start reading this and agreeing with it, about the only option that you have would be to bring it up at the next grassroots meeting. If they let you. Good luck. let me know if it works, and you can thank me later.

Alcoholism

When did alcoholism become a disease instead of a lack of self control? This is one of the questions that keeps me from getting a good nights sleep. Before every person in a program starts raining down on me, catch your breath. I have spent a good part of my life around people in recovery. (It's amazing how even the jargon seeps into your life) My father was a recovering alcoholic for the last 15 years of his life. A variety of his girlfriends had been involved with al-anon at some point or other. But my Dad was the first to admit the problem was his and his alone. It wasn't a genetic predisposition that he had. It wasn't because he had some underlying psychosis that he couldn't control. My Dad couldn't stop drinking once he started, and that made his life unmanageable. He told me many times of the moment that he realized that he was not in control when he was drinking. He said he came to, in his truck, with the engine running. He had a full tank of gasoline and he was over a hundred miles from his home. He had no idea how he got there, what he did before that, or anything else about the event. The last thing he did remember was 30 hours before that when he had just clocked out of work. That was what it took to sober my Dad. In all the time after that, I only saw him take one drink, ever. And that was when we had gone out to dinner to celebrate a particularly horrible woman moving out of my Father's life. But I have seen alcoholics in other places, too. The hardest part is watching the person who takes care of them. The jargon is an enabler. It is very hard to watch when the enabler is someone that you love very much. The only thing that I can suggest is that you leave a few brochures about al-anon setting around for them to find. I can't say that it will help, but one thing from all the jargon is very true. You can't help someone before they want to be helped. And I'll bet you thought I was going to stay off topic, didn't you? Well, here we are. The same can be said about Walmart. The company as a whole will not stop doing the things that they are getting away with until it isn't financially feasible for them. As long as people put up with cheap crap from China, and don't patronize their local merchants, Walmart will flourish. It is kind of handy to get everything at one place, but I also like going to the butcher shop for my meat. Not only do I get very personalized service (trimmed fat, great recipes, etc.) but I know that I am doing something to keep the local economy succeeding. See if you can't find a few local shops to buy at least some of your groceries. You'll thank me later.

Politics and the Media

I just finished watching the most interesting interview. If you can find the site to http://www.howobamagotelected/ it is so eyeopening. The first time that I watched it, it was to see exit interviews with some of the brain trusts that helped to inflict BO on our country. I have never seen such a collection as the ones I watched that day. I kept thinking of the quote from Forrest Gump, "stupid is as stupid does." Not only were these people totally ignorant of the facts, but they had been so influenced by the media, that they simply attributed anything good with BO and anything bad with McCain and Palin. Now, I will be the first to say that the way the RNC handled Sarah Palin was ridiculous. They should have just let her be herself and not try to cram her into some cookie cutter that they had chosen. She is brilliant, and a huge threat to every liberal out there. How do I know that she was a threat? Because of the incredibly vicious and personal attacks, that's how. Can you imagine any one starting the rumor that Hillary Clinton wasn't Chelsea's Mom? I've heard the jokes, and while tasteless, they are funny. But the point is, the liberal media would have quickly shamed anyone who dared to impugn the child of Hillary Clinton by saying that children should be off limits. That seems to be true unless you are talking about a Republican child. Look at the flack that was raised over George W. Bush's daughters. At one point, the media and tabloids had them one step away from an appearance on Girls Gone Wild. Nice. But, as I said, their biggest crime was in being the children of Republicans, wasn't it? I'm sure that MSNBC and CNN would like to make that a capitol offense if they could. But the point I am taking so long to make is that the bias in the media is so overwhelming as to be laughable. There was a time when the liberals even tried to argue that this bias didn't exist. Now, instead, they point to talk radio. See? They cry, with their bottom lip poofed out. The talk radio is so overwhelmingly conservative that we should be able to pass laws mandating fairness!! I think such a law already exists. It's called the law of commerce. If talk radio wasn't hugely popular, the sponsors would run from it in droves. Like that foray AirAmerica, the liberal attempt at talk radio. All I can say is, if Al (why look, I just found some more votes) Franken is so great, why doesn't anyone want to listen to him? Enough of this mind scattering. The mainstream media clearly has an agenda. A simple conversation with any of them and you can see it for yourself. Their ideas have been presented as normal, but they aren't. At least not to the average person, anyway. Question what you hear from media sources. There was a time when you could take it at face value, but that time is long since passed. Be careful. Like the song says, believe half of what you see, some or none of what you hear. You'll thank me later.

My Apologies

I would like to apologize to everyone that reads my blog on a regular basis. One of the elements that I have on this page are Cheeky Quotes. I have no idea what they are going to be, they just get sent. Yesterday or the day before, I saw that the quote was congratulating BO on his inauguration. Since he has yet to supply a birth certificate that isn't his sister's; I still don't believe he is legally eligible to be the Commander in Chief. I removed the quote and only returned it today. Again, my apologies if this offended any one as much as it offended me. Sorry. p.s. do you think we'll get to see that footage the LA Times is still sitting on? My bet is that we won't see it until they have clintoned (that is desensitized) us enough.

Just off the Top of My Head

Normally I put more than a few moments thought into something that I write. At least I try to, no matter what the end result may be. But today, I purposefully sat down with almost no thought given to what I was going to write. The reason? I wanted to have an impromptu grassroots meeting so to speak. That is to say, I wanted to see how many ideas I could come up with that would help The Mom&Pop Store Killer that is Walmart. First of all, they could do away with their crappy insurance and the people who work in that division could be added to other areas. I have said this before, take your pool of potential clients and shop for bids from the local area insurance salespeople. A win win situation of associates with decent insurance and local responsiveness would result. Second, when the store must cut hours, do it by percentages so that everyone feels the same pain. Third, have some sort of accountability. For everyone. Too many managers are able to slide around the fraternization rules, with no consequences. Many people seem to think that a labor union would be able to come in and wave its magic wand and fix everything. I don't necessarily believe that that would happen, but Walmart needs to have someone or something overseeing the situation, because whatever they have now, isn't cutting it. Fourth, when it comes to promotions and the inside track, I don't think that stores are able to effectively evaluate their own personnel. Too many brown -nosers and incompetent managers have been shined on to thinking that they know what they are doing. I don't think that could be further from the truth. Perhaps they could start an evaluation team that came in and assessed the potential hires without the bias that some Walmarts are famous for. Lastly, and keep in mind that I have only been considering this post for about ten minutes, I think that the best idea that Walmart could introduce is the shifting of managers every three years. Even if it's only to a different store in the same district, the revamping and "new blood" would do wonders for removing any appearance of favoritism in a particular store, and it would expose the managers to many other situations, thereby increasing their knowledge of the company. How could they lose? I'll let you know if I hear of any of these being implemented, and you can thank me later.

Privacy

Everyone loves to read about celebrities, don't they? I myself have been guilty of looking through a tabloid if I see one setting around. I don't think I have ever bought one though. My cheapness gene is much too dominant for that. But as I was tooling around the Internet, (who needs the Enquirer when you can get all the gossip online?) I kept running across sites that mentioned John Travolta and the horrific loss he has suffered. Of course, there were the usual group of sites that expressed their sympathy. The disturbing thing to me was the amount of sites dedicated to exposing the "truth" about what had happened to Mr. Travolta's son. The only thing that I could think was dear Lord, this man has lost his son, his first born. And now he can't even grieve in private because three bazillion jackasses want to throw their two cents and conspiracy theories into the mess. It seems crazy, but it's true. Somehow all of these people came to the conclusion that just because they can post about this tragedy, they would. Pitiful. Whatever happened to respecting a person's grief, or at least their privacy? I have a Brother who lost his oldest son to SIDS. I was young when it happened, but the shock and hurt of it are still fresh to me. The thought of my brother having to sort through the blinding shock and grief while dodging the leaches of today's media is frightening. Just because someone makes movies, or music or even throws a football should not give anyone licence to their personal lives. I'll bet you are wondering how in the world I can tie this in with the Big Hearted Giant of Retail, aren't you? Well, there are Walmart managers who have indicated that what you write on your myspace account, your blogs, and even a web site can come back and affect your job. Where does a person's right to privacy come in to play?? (See the connection now?) What a person does off the clock is no more Walmart's business then it is mine. If I am salaried, there might be an incredibly weak argument, but if I am hourly, what business is it of any one's -especially Walmart- what I am doing? Or writing? Or saying to someone else while I'm online? Where does it end? I knew that Walmart had many products in their stores, I never realized that they also carry Big Brother now. So if you get a check from Walmart every two weeks, be careful what you think, write or say. Apparently, Walmart is a little bigger than free speech. You'll thank me later.

Make a Wish

What would you wish for if you could have anything in the world? Would it be something like the lottery, or would it be good health for you or someone that you love? I think that if I had one guaranteed, without fail wish to spend, I would wish for all the people that I love to be happy. I know, I know, it seems like such a silly wish, doesn't it? It kind of sounds like beauty pageant contestants who wish for world peace. I can't help it, though. I would love for every person that I know to be happy. Or at least content. I think that if you can manage to be content that you have the whole happiness thing knocked, don't you? I better be careful, or I'm going to start sounding like one of those motivational speakers. But things have never made me happy. Don't get me wrong, a bargain, wherever it is found, can make me smile for the afternoon. But I don't think that having things is the path to being happy. I think that being content with what you have- a mansion or a mobile home- is the key. I am not defending the retail giant we all know and love by any means. But if you have a job, however crappy it may be, and it's paying your bills-be content. Many people would give up a kidney to be in your place. I'm not saying that you should stop sending me emails that let me know the shenanigans of your happy little management team, either. But if you can look past all the crap that you have to put up with there, and just be content with what you have going on in your life, trust me, you'll thank me later.

Flu 1 Me ZERO

Are you a good patient? I am not. I am cranky, and whiny and horrible to be around when I am sick. Sorry, but I am. I don't have much faith in a flu shot either. With so many kinds of influenza, and all those shifting antigens, I don't see how one shot is going to stop me from getting some mutated version of whatever crap is going around. And this year the flu seems to be a dandy one two combination of nausea and diarrhea. Good times. I have lost quite a bit of weight, so there is that. But it makes me wonder how folks with anorexia have the will power to stick with it. No offense to the late Karen Carpenter, of course. I seem to be absolutely exhausted all the time. I have no energy, and no appetite, either. Of course, it's hard to have an appetite when you know that whatever you eat is going to come screaming out of one end or the other at the speed of sound. I also love all the home cures for Flu. I have a relative who shall remain nameless for this blog entry. This particular family member knows every wives tale, home cure, try this from the old days remedy for the last half century. It's like being a science experiment every day of your sickness. I have tried onion soup. I have tried garlic tea. The same with chicken soup, chamomile tea and countless other cures. I do not want to go to the doctor. I hate it when they say "yep. That's the flu. Plenty of rest and liquids. That will be eighty five dollars, please. " I can rest and drink broth a lot better with the eighty five dollars in my pocket. Thank you very much. I know you imagine that I am off point completely with the store that Sam built, but not really. Given Walmart's absentee policy, how much less likely are you to take off work when you are sick? Don't get me wrong, I have worked with some associates who took off work when the wind shifted. But the way the policy is written now, if you try to stay home for a few days and simply heal, you will likely find yourself out of a job. I guess it's much better idea to go in every day and spread it around to everyone you see, and everything that you touch. Don't you? So here I sit, running for the bathroom every half hour or so, at least with the luxury of not having to spread this around Walmart. I hope that someone in Bentonville reads this and changes their sick policy. If they do, you can thank me later.

Dabbling in Politics

At the risk of offending the people who read this to hear me vent about Walmart, let me change the subject for a brief moment today. I think that the business of running our Country is one of the most important in the world. And I shudder to think of some of the semi-illiterate dufusses( or is the plural of dufus-dufi?) that we have in charge of things. BO is going to be one of the worst things to happen to these United States since the recent Carter then Clinton debacle. I notice a concerted effort to try to make Jimmy Carter seem like a statesman now. He certainly is a better ex president than he ever was a president. I think of him every time I put on a sweater. Or have someone I love held hostage and tortured for over a year. Of course, after President Ford pardoned Nixon, the backlash was going to be horrific. It's only now that anyone has gotten around to admitting that putting the whole sordid mess behind us was the best thing for the country. Bill Clinton, or slick willie, as I have always called him, is in a class by himself. How many felonies did he get away with? And how about those pardons that he sold to get his wife elected? Or, better yet, how about those nuclear secrets he seems to have let slip right out from under him. Never mind the obvious lack of self control on his part-what about all the willful lies and perjury that he committed? Or the terrible shredding of a person's reputation? Thank God Monica Lewinsky had a bizarre pack rat fetish. But anyway..... I don't even listen to television news anymore. The fawning over this particular administration triggers my gag reflex in less than a minute. I pray for him not to ruin anything in the two years he has until the next election. I also pray for a major conservative to make him or herself known in that time. No more milquetoast candidates. I hope that somewhere is a true conservative, someone who isn't trying to ride the middle of the road. Someone who understands that Ronald Reagan was brilliant and had the best vision for this country since I can remember. It's going to be a bumpy ride, no question. With Liberals running the show in all three houses, all we can do is sit back and get ready to give the government more of our money because we aren't smart enough to take care of it ourselves. Just ask them. I can only hope that socialized medicine, socialized jobs, and socialized thinking does as well as midnight basketball. Does anyone else remember that pearl of wisdom from the Clinton administration? But enough of my doom and gloom. He hasn't even sat his unqualified butt in the desk of the oval office (where was he born, seriously??) and he already has the selling of his senate seat to deal with. What was his cut of that, anyway? I pray that it gets better. I keep thinking of something that my dad use to say. If you don't respect the person, at least respect the office that they hold. I hope that helps you get through the next two years. If it does, you can thank me later.

Pack Those Bags, We Sell Garbage Bags For That

I got a very funny email from a cashier named Deanna, today. Deanna has been with Walmart for over 17 years and she looks forward to retiring from there someday. Deanna is 64 years old, and would like to be able to make it to 20 years. She thinks that is a nice round number to call it quits. Deanna doesn't know if she will make it to twenty years if she has many more days like the one she had today. She was working her usual shift, she is one of those blessed individuals who only have to work days for the company that cares. She was working through her line of customers when the manager on the front end asked her to turn off her light and come see her at the podium. When Deanna got to the podium, this is what the manager told her," I notice that you aren't filling the bags as full as they will hold. Try to be more careful and make sure that you are filling each bag with the most that it will hold. Some of these people want us to half fill the bags so that they can use our bags for trash later. We sell garbage bags for that." Deanna tried to explain that many of her customers were getting up there in years and simply couldn't carry heavy bags. That fell on deaf ears. So Deanna went back to her register, seething. She tried filling the bags a little fuller, but she noticed that then she couldn't lift them well. Deanna went back to filling the bags the way she always has, for over 17 years and she just hopes that this new assistant manager doesn't notice. How much can one of those plastic bags cost Walmart? 3/4 of a penny? A penny at most? Didn't they spend more money fussing at her to fill the bags that the cost of the bag? It's just one more thing to add to the list of things I will never understand about a company that seems set on nickle and dime-ing itself to death. If I get an update on the saga of saving money one penny at a time; I'll let you know and you can thank me later.

Some People Should Never Be In Charge

Do you ever wonder what a person is really like?If you want to get a true look at a person's character, put them in charge of something. It doesn't have to be anything major, just something. I believe that is the only way to get an honest look at their true character. You may be frightened by what you see. The connection that I am making to the Retail Slavedriver we all know and love is this-what is the divining process that they use to chose their managers? I spoke to someone not that long ago, and she was bragging that the managers in her store are constantly asking her to go into the manager trainee program. I was polite, but dumbfounded. If this is truly the case, and not just a person reading too much into a "good job ****" then I have no idea what Walmart uses to decide who will be in charge of something. I know that they like to brag that so many of their managers used to be hourly associates, but there has to be a more vigorous screening process, honestly. What is the criteria for putting someone in charge of something at Walmart. I know they have a supervisor test that weeds out many of the would be flunkies. But what about some of the dandies that get in? Is there no personality profile to stop some of these gems? Maybe they could look into that. This would be an excellent segue into politics, but let's stay on point for just a moment, shall we? The people that Walmart chooses to put in charge of other people seems confusing at best. I understand that they have recruiting fairs for college graduates that give them a leg up on joining the company that cares. But what about all of the former associates? What exactly is the criteria for making the jump from hourly peon to salaried member of management? I have had maybe three good managers in all the time that I have had Walmart signing my checks. Three. And two of them were ground up and spit out in less time then you can say unappreciated. I hope that Walmart is able to realize what they are doing to people that work for them. I hope that they are able to stop the drain-both physical and mental-on the good people that work for them. I hope I don't pass out or die of old age waiting for this to happen. But, I'll keep plugging away at this, and if I hear any good news in the horizon, I'll pass it on. You can thank me later.

Another Hate Site, Goody....

While I was messing around today I ran across another Walmart hate site. It is a little different than the other one I enjoy making so much fun of, but the same people seem to be running the asylum. They also seem to lack a thesaurus or a dictionary-sorry, but misspelled words are a pet peeve of mine. Especially when the words are part of your supposedly impressive opening animation. Just to help the folks who designed it--your is not the same as you're. I think you were trying to contract you are and instead you went with the possessive. Oops. Are you trying to say that some one is an entire ass? If you are than the way you have it spelled is fine,otherwise it is spelled ***hole, okay? And finally, unless you are EllieMay Clampett, no one is going to do something ever chance they get. They might do it every chance but that's a story for a different time, isn't it? This begs the question, how much can you truly hate your job if you are spending all of your free time not on one hate site, but two? I guess I must not be managing my time well enough.... But if you need some mental Novocaine the site is http://www.beyondsucks.com/ . How clever is that? I will say the graphics make the other site I have mentioned look like it was designed by a differently abled pre-schooler. But enough of the new place to gripe about you know who. I have been spending quite a bit of time trying to organize my thoughts lately about how it is possible for a company to get so far off course in so little time. I understand that Sam Walton is no longer around to be the moral compass of the company he created. But seriously, is there not one living Walton who could put the company back on track? Do you remember the commercials that Walmart used to run, showing the companies that they had saved from going belly up? Now it would seem that they drive all of those companies to other countries so that they can pay their employees 10 cents an hour and Walmart can get their crap (that is- merchandise) even cheaper. I worry about this path that they are on. It reminds me too much of the path that this country seems set on also. B.O. hasn't even put his ineligible(I'm sticking to that until he shows me a birth certificate that isn't his sister's) sorry butt in the Oval Office and he is already mired in controversy. What is his percentage on the sale of his Senate seat? I see that the good Governor of Illinois, Mr. Blagojevich has chosen someone to fill the seat, even as his political career is going up in flames. I have to wonder, if he does end up in prison over this, is he going to get a haircut? His hair looks like the worst hairpiece I have ever seen on a politician. And that is saying something. So cross your fingers everyone, it looks like the crap is coming. If you get too depressed, do what I do. Mutter to yourself, two more years until an election. Slick Willy made it so bad that a rise in Conservatism swept the country, in spite of the media. I can only hope that B.O. does the same. As for Walmart's latest hate site, if it turns out to be a viper pit of nut jobs like that other one, I'll let you know, and you can thank me later.

1-800-WALMART

Have you had a problem at your friendly neighborhood Walmart? Did someone in the store help you with your problem, or did you leave there even angrier than when you went in? I am going to guess that this has happened to almost everyone at some point or another. The customer service in a Walmart can be absolutely atrocious. Many times you will encounter the deadly combination I like to call willful ignorance. What is willful ignorance you may ask? Well, I'm here to explain it for you. Willful ignorance is when you run in to an employee at the retail giant- with- a- heart and that employee has absolutely no interest in helping you what so ever!! The first time that you encounter willful ignorance, you may not even realize that that is what it is. You may think that you just ran into someone who isn't that particularly bright. Wrong. A willfully ignorant person will offer you no help at all, and they are not the least bit apologetic for it, either. Nope, not one bit. A WI will also treat you as though you are a nuisance to them, and getting in the way of the real work that they have to do. It escapes them that you, the customer, are in fact the only reason that they have a job. Remember, they are willfully ignorant. There is only one known cure for the willfully ignorant that I have seen. The cure is to call 1.800.walmart and pitch a fit. Start by asking to have the District Manager call you. The District Managers have a very good life within the confines of Walmart, inc. You may have to call more than once, but be patient, you will hear from them. The next thing that you will have to do is be prepared to make a fuss about what happened to you while you were shopping. Do not let the Manager get off with simply saying "Thank you for bringing this to our attention. " Demand to know what he or she is going to do to make it right. And if you get any resistance from the District Manager, don't be afraid to go up to the Regional Manager. One word of advise though, do it straight away. Try to be the first one to the Regional Manager, so that you can explain your side of the problem first. If the District Manager gets their first, he is going to do everything he can to paint you as a malcontent. But don't take no for an answer. If the Regional Manager won't help you, he has a boss also. Just keep dialing, eventually you will find someone who will help you. Good luck, and you can thank me later.

Can Someone Explain this to Me?

I like to think of myself as a pretty intelligent person. Not too many things stump me. But this problem that I am about to write about has me absolutely perplexed. I know someone who is going through a very rough patch in her life. She is in the process of a divorce and she hates every minute of it. One of the problems that she is facing is that the man she thought she said forever to has turned out to be a cheating, lying, adulterer. The other thing she found out was that he has committed numerous felonies. He is not a drug dealer or anything like that, he simply rolled odometers for important people in the town he lives in. It turns out that odometer tampering is a felony in the state of Indiana. That would make sense, it can be a serious crime. Well, when my friend found out about her husband's extra curricular activities, she confronted him. He laughed in her face and said that the people he did these favors for would protect him. Guess what? When she tried to contact MaryClara Winebrenner-the prosecuting attorney for Auburn, Indiana- and explain what was going on with her husband, Ms. Winebrenner refused to hear about it! She said that the only way she could get involved was if this woman submitted any information that she has to a law enforcement officer and then she could take a look at the information. ???? So if you know of a crime being committed, don't bother Mary Clara. She's much too busy prosecuting women who defend themselves in battery cases. The folks in Dekalb County sure are getting their money's worth aren't they? Then this lady told me that she tried to give the information to her attorney who is handling her divorce. He told her that if she tried to bring the information up, he would remove himself from the case because he doesn't want to jeopardize his career in the area!! I didn't know that attorneys were allowed to pick and choose the ethics that they care to follow. So here is a word of advice- take it for what it is worth. One-be careful about buying a car in the Auburn, Indiana area. If you email me I will tell you the name of the company that was rolling odometers for important people. Two- if you need to see justice for a crime that is or was committed in Dekalb County, the prosecuting attorney- MaryClara Winebrenner might not be the best choice. She has a submission policy for crimes that she will prosecute, and justice doesn't seem to be a high priority for her. Third, if your Attorney works for Kruse and Kruse, you might want to reconsider that, also. This is the firm that employs the lawyer who refuses to do his job for his client because it could hurt him politically. If someone bothers to give me answers, I will be more than happy to pass them on. In the meantime, stay out of Auburn, Indiana and Dekalb County, Indiana. You'll thank me later.

Have They Made Up a Good Enough Story About Where BO was Born Yet?

I love the political scene. I have followed politics for a while, I am still shaking my head in disgust over the media's high jacking of the last election. They had their boy picked from the getgo and that was all there was to it, wasn't it? I imagine it came as quite a shock to Hillary as well, she was under the impression that she was the anointed one, but live and learn, I guess. I find it curious that the Supreme Court won't hear the case of the gentleman who is suing to get a look at BO's real birth certificate. Of course, the weasel elect hasn't even parked his butt in the oval office and it turns out he has one of his first scandals, already. It would seem that some of his crooked friends are trying to sell his senate seat to the highest bidder. Wow! A crooked friend of his-what are the odds? At least with Hillary in his cabinet, she can explain the horrible coincidence of all the folks who died while in the employ or inner circle of the Slick Willie's. I wonder if he'll take notes? But back to the main question- where was Barack Hussein Obama born? I know where his sister was born, he's already tried to pass her birth certificate off as his own. I remember when the media had a conniption about John McCain being born in the Panama Canal area, and I think that was their out. They planned to say- well, McCain wasn't born here either!! Pity that none of them read the requirements and saw that he was still eligible because his parents were both citizens and his Father was in the Active Military so he was still eligible. Common sense and the main stream media aren't often on the same bus, are they? I hope that someone is able to tell me definatively where BO was born. Of course, if he was actually born here, the media would have been screaming the details from every tree top, wouldn't they? I believe if they had the goods-so to speak- there would have been a copy of the certificate on every major news outlet in the world. We have two years of dark times ahead. Liberals control every house and they've had the media in their pocket since Nixon. Gird your loins- and as one other blogger said, it was the debacle of Clinton (anyone remember midnight basketball?) that gave us the rise of conservativism in the nineties, who knows what great conservative is waiting to be discovered from the mess that BO is about to make? Hope for the best, that's what I am doing. And if I'm right, you can thank me later.

Who Set These Ungodly Hours, Anyway?

Do you think working at Walmart is just underpaid drudgery? Have you checked out a Distribution Center? The pay there is much, much better than if you are slaving away at a retail store. Whereas a store may start you as low as $6.50, a DC is probably going to start you off around $14.25 or so. Much better, don't you think. But is there a catch? Of course there is! The hours at a Walmart Distribution Center are some of the most brutal that you will run across. The regular day shift (that only those chosen by God will ever get to work) are Monday through Thursday 4a.m. to 2:30 pm. You will work four ten hour days and in case you are wondering-no you will not get a paid lunch break. I know, I know, penny ante tiny companies give their employees a paid lunch, but not here, get over it. The second shift is 2p.m. to 12:30 a.m. most of the time. On weekends, it's a whole different ball game. There are two twelve hour shifts 4 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. and 4p.m. to 3:30 a.m. On the weekend you work Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Because Walmart is actually paying you a living wage, they expect to take the life from you. At a Distribution Center, there are no mistakes tolerated. If you accidentally destroy something, you are held accountable. That means they will get their money back one way or another. But the question I am asking is-why do they have to start at 4 a.m.? Would the freight not be okay if they started shifts at say- 8 in the morning, or even 10? What is the problem with letting people actually work a normal shift starting time, only a little longer? Is it because Walmart resents having to pay their associates that kind of money, so they expect their pound of flesh, also? I'm sure that can't be it. That would make Walmart seem kind of petty wouldn't it? But I guess you take the good with the bad, don't you? If you want to have any kind of life at all, you stay away from working at a distribution center, and if you want to have decent hours-but no money-you work at a retail outlet. It doesn't seem like a good choice either way, does it? Maybe, just maybe you don't work there at all. If that's the one you chose, you can thank me later.

Then You Haven't Really Read This, Have You?

A few days ago, I wrote about an email that I received, accusing me of all sorts of skulduggery and covert operations. I giggled about it, I won't lie. After I wrote the last post, I took some time to go through old blogs that I had written. I don't know what kind of right thinking person could read any of the things that I have published and accuse me of being a plant, but there you have it. I also don't know how much extra time a person like this must have on their hands either. If that is the case, I have a back log of things that I would love to get finished. Can you give me a hand with some of that? A few people have emailed me to ask me how I came to write this blog. I have answered everyone who has asked for my background, and if anyone else reading this has any questions, send me an email and I'll be glad to answer your questions, too. I explained all of this in blogs from the past. Read through them and you will get every answer that you could possibly want. I have also had quite a few interesting emails from people that have pointed out some curious things that have gone on in their own stores. I ask for stories from other stores and DC's all the time. Which part of this makes me the management spy? What do you think? So for the last time that I will address this, No. I am not a management plant who is doing some sort of covert ops. I am not digging around for things to get other associates with. I hope that puts the question to rest. If you still have questions about my being a member of Walmart's management send me an email. I'll explain it in small words and you can thank me later.

If You Think I'm a Management Plant......

I got a wonderfully scary email last week from someone name Tamara who claimed I was a manager from Walmart and that this entire blog was simply a trap to catch unsuspecting Walmart associates saying something mean about the Big Hearted Company that signs their checks. I giggled for a couple of minutes, then I sent some of my more favorite links to the address. Then I forwarded the email to a friend of mine and we both had a good giggle. Maybe it's the withdrawal from all of the Holiday sugar, but let me say for the record. I am not a plant for any company, and any opinions found in this blog are mine if no one else's. What does that say about today's society that we are looking for moles and spies every where that we turn? And more importantly, what kind of State Secrets are they sitting on at Walmart that they have all of the hired help so afraid of being spied on? I can only imagine, and I'm sure that whatever I think of will be funnier than the actual thing. In truth, the thought of me being a spy for that particular company is kind of pathetic. What kind of company culture is it that breeds suspicion and mistrust so deeply in their associates? Or, is it not the Company, but the people themselves? I don't know the answer, but I hope that it's not contagious. Seriously. Watching the stock market has been pretty exciting lately. It reminds me of the stock options that you have with the company that cares. If you do purchase stock from your check while employed with Walmart, they (that is Walmart) will kick in a little bit more for you. It adds up over time, and if you plan on being with the company for a long time, it's not the worst thing that you can do for yourself. The problem is, that once you quit (or are terminated) Walmart will send you a check for your shares in about a month. So if you are planning on sitting on those stock purchases, think again. Once you are out the door, they want their stock back. Why is that? I guess I'll just add it to the growing list of things that I don't understand about Walmart. I've seen the job of some of the Walmart managers. Long 12 hour days, sometimes five or six in a row, and sometimes longer than 12 hours. No thank you. When do they see their families? Do they see their families? Perhaps that would explain why some of the managers end up in affairs with other managers. If the only people that you are spending any time with are the people that you work with, things happen, don't they? Not good things. Especially if there are children who are about to have their world torn up because of another person's lack of self control, but things do happen, don't they? So at any rate- to anonymous from Alabama, no. I am not a management plant, or spy, or whatever else you thought I might be. Avoid that trainee program if you want to have a family or a life. You'll thank me later.

And a Happy New Year!!!!

If I sat down, I could probably tell you where I was for every New Year's Eve since I could remember. Some of my favorites involved my Father and a gun. Before you start having visions of Appalachia and Deliverance let me explain that it was my Father's tradition to ring in the New Year by shooting one of his many shotguns into the air. Having been raised in Kentucky, it was just something that he did every year, and I am certain that his neighbors loved him for it. At any rate, some of those years that I recall, I spent ringing in the New Year while on the clock at the happiest Haven for retail. I have asked this before, but what earthly purpose does it serve Walmart to be open on New Year's Eve? I have been in the store many many times on New Years Eve, and the business was not so overwhelming that it would have been missed. Why won't Walmart close its doors on the Major Holidays and let its associates spend it with their families? Think of all the good will that this would create. Think of all the wonderful press that this could garner for them. Think it will ever happen? Don't hold your breath. For whatever reason that it uses, Walmart refuses to consider the families of the associates when it is making schedules. There is nothing to be lost and so many things to be gained if Walmart would just let go of the greed and close its doors on major Holidays. I hope that they read this or have it forwarded to them. Think it over Walmart, the time that you let your associates spend with their families on the Holidays would be priceless time that would mean the world to them and their loved ones. You'll thank me later.